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Submitted by A Former Pizza Man:
It was December 31, 1997. I had been working for a little over a year as a pizza maker, and even though I wasn't all that happy with the job, I liked having the job, since that meant I could afford both housing and food. Anyway, I'd screwed up a few pizzas that night and the Assistant Manager had gotten very upset with me. Anyway, I had earlier that day bought a new bottle of Tequila (store brand) and Strawberry Margarita Mix (also store brand) in anticipation of a fantastic New Year's Eve celebration. Well, the later stern talking-to kind of soured my evening, and I believe that over the course of the evening, I drank almost two blenders' worth of the syrupy concoction, to my guests' horror. I don't remember a whole lot of what happened, but I do remember calling an ex's parents in the middle of the night to wish them a happy new year, and then hanging up on them, and after that I got out my photo album to explain to an unfortunate guest exactly who I had spoken to in such a manner. The rest of the evening was a literal blur of spinning rooms.
The next morning, well, that was a different story. After I worshipped the porcelain goddess on five different occasions that morning, I swore off Tequila forever.
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